Abstract
This analysis examines literary representations of migrating mothers in seven Polish children’s and young adult books on transnational families, evaluated through grounded theory. While media discourse oversimplifies migration as a deviation from the normative ideal of the present mother, resulting in the deprecating label ‘Euro-orphans’, literary depictions offer a more nuanced perspective. The study identifies three distinct types of mothers – ‘deviant’, ‘incomplete’ and ‘complete’ – with migration portrayed as a juncture in family life that challenges their maternal status. The narratives reveal different family trajectories and obstacles while offering nuanced portrayals of mothers, including their biographies and character traits. Ultimately, however, they reinforce conventional norms of ‘good’ motherhood by portraying transnational family and motherhood as deviations from the norm. Nonetheless, the narratives acknowledge children’s active roles in co-shaping their family arrangements and the evolving status of the ‘good’ mother, emphasising that children are not merely victims of their circumstances.
Introduction
‘My mum says [...] you’re a Euro-orphan.’
‘What?’ I feel a growing rage.
‘Well, she says this is such a societal problem, parents going off to work and leaving their children all alone, as if they were orphans.’1 (Jagiełło, 2023: 164)
This quote from a children’s book is part of a dialogue between two girls. In particular, the quote draws attention to the term ‘Euro-orphan’, first used in the media and later adopted by the public to describe the situation of children whose parents migrate for economic reasons. It implies that the parents have migrated towards Europe, at the same time suggesting that the children are victims of their parents’ quest for economic success – the symbolic Euro – and have been left alone without protection (Lutz and Palenga-Mollenbeck, 2012). The term reflects strong societal emotions, as Urbańska (2015) highlights, adopting Cohen’s concept of ‘moral panic’. In particular, migrating mothers are perceived as a threat to the moral state of society and the social order.
Transnational families are the subject not only of media debates but also of children’s and young adult (YA) books. In Poland, there is a small number of books dedicated to transnational families. In this context, transnational families are understood as nuclear families in which the mother/father moves abroad while the children remain in the home country (Danilewicz, 2009: 227; Walczak, 2016: 29ff.). As I will demonstrate in this article, the migrating mother is focused on in both the media and in representations in children’s and YA literature. So far, However, there is hardly any research on the representations of migrating mothers in such books.
The aim of this article is to reconstruct representations of migrating mothers in Polish children’s and YA books. Following a sociological understanding of literature, I consider children’s and YA books as social documents or products of social conditions (Dörner and Vogt, 2013: 2) that are in a continuous process of change and exchange with society (Farzin, 2016: 4). They function as a medium through which social phenomena are interpreted, represented and processed. Similarly to media debates (such as press and internet reports), they create public visibility of social phenomena like transnational families. Both discourses and mediums have a normative effect, and the images as well as patterns they portray are powerful (Gromadzka, 2017; Seidel, 2022). However, they address different target groups: children’s and YA literature is aimed specifically at young readers. Although Gromadzka (2022; see also Michułka, 2023) argues that while transnational migration in general is an increasingly common motif in children’s and YA books, there are only a few analyses dedicated to this topic. Two such analyses, by Zając (2023) and Rembowska-Płuciennik (2024), focus on the depictions of transnational families and everyday lives of children, revealing that these books construct an image of the lonely, suffering, abandoned child, and even of a ‘lost generation’ (Rembowska-Płuciennik, 2024: 288). Simultaneously, the analyses provide evidence that these stories place more emphasis on mothers than on fathers. However, there is no detailed examination of how mothers are portrayed in literary narratives. This article addresses this gap by focusing on three analytical questions: how are migrating mothers portrayed in children’s and YA literature? Which interpretive frameworks are created in relation to their motherhood? And finally: to what extent is maternal migration presented as a deviation or as a legitimate form of motherhood and family life?
The article is structured as follows: after this introduction, the article presents an overview of theoretical and empirical findings on normative patterns of ‘good’ motherhood, which are linked to the media discourse on transnational mothers and families. The focus here is on the Polish context. This is followed by a description of the methodological approach, accompanied by analytical reflections. The empirical results are presented in section four: seven children’s and YA books are analysed using the grounded theory methodological approach (Strauss, 1998). The portrayals of mothers are matched to three empirically developed types: the deviant mother, the incomplete mother and the complete mother. The types are outlined along the migration process to illustrate how representations of mothers change and how they can be related to the question of literary representations of motherhood. The fifth and final section summarises the analysis and results.
Theoretical elements and state of the art of ‘good’ motherhood
Societies often have narrow ideas of what constitutes a ‘good’ mother and, therefore, ‘good’ motherhood. These ideas are largely characterised by the children’s needs. Accordingly, ‘good’ motherhood is seen as a relational concept that is both linked to normative notions of ‘good’ childhood and shaped by societal interests (Hungerland, 2018: 29). These normative ideas are a highly exclusionary construct. Mothers who do not conform to these norms are sanctioned by society, and their motherhood practices are portrayed as deviant (Bühler-Niederberger, 2020).
Since the 18th century, the discourse on what constitutes a ‘good’ mother has been intensive and public (Badinter, 1984; Schütze, 1991; Plant, 2010). In the Polish context, the ideal mother is embodied by the myth of the ‘Mother-Pole’ – a figure that originated in the upper classes during the struggle for Polish independence in the 19th century and is associated with the subsequent uprisings against the occupying powers. It became widespread among all social classes in the interwar period (Zielińska, 2010). She embodies the ideal of an altruistic woman characterised by complete devotion and moral strength, whose vocation is to raise children in the spirit of patriotism (Imbierowicz, 2012: 430). However, as Ostrowska (1998: 433) notes, this high moral position resulted in a ‘deprivation of subjectivity’ and the essentialisation of female maternal duties.2
By now, there are numerous studies examining the ‘modernity’ of the myth (see Hryciuk and Korolczuk, 2012; Maciąg-Budkowska and Rzepa, 2017; Szymanik-Kostrzewska and Michalska, 2020) and the transformation of motherhood (Bartkowiak, 2015), for instance in relation to maternal self-realisation and sexuality (Szlachta-Ignatowicz, 2022). However, many expectations directed towards mothers persist and are even reinforced by the increasingly growing ‘new traditionalism’ in societal discourse (Rejowska, 2018), such as the centrality of the mother in family life and the associated demand for her physical presence (ROPS, 2015; Lutz, 2018; König et al, 2021; for more context, see also Hochschild, 2012; Schmidt et al, 2023).3 These expectations are social demands that also represent an empirical reality (Sikorska, 2019). Maternal presence is required not only within the family itself but also within national borders. Thus, an absent and migrating mother violates the cultural taboo of the social ideas ascribed to this role, becoming a figure of suspicion and the object of social attention (Urbańska, 2015: 314).
Based on an analysis of Polish media, Urbańska (2015) illustrates that, although parents migrating together is sometimes mentioned, only the the mother is used to dramatise and pathologise the children’s situation.4 The migrating mother is painted as materialistic and selfish, putting her own needs before those of her children (for Lithuania: Juozeliūnienė and Budginaitė, 2018). Her actions, portrayed as incompetent parenting and irresponsibility towards her children (Lutz, 2018) and are stigmatised as a societal evil (Slany et al, 2014). Lutz and Palenga-Möllenbeck (2012: 14) describe the logic of this maternal discourse and its characterisations as ‘naming, blaming, shaming’, while Urbańska (2015: 308) summarises such discourse as ‘moral panic’: maternal migration is presented as a threat to societal values, interests, and even national identity. It must be emphasised that only less privileged migrating women, such as economic migrants, are the target of these discourses (Urbańska, 2010; Lutz, 2018).5 Such public discourse can be understood as a societal and national attempt to establish a specific order (Walczak, 2016: 120). Analysis of forum posts by mothers working abroad indicates just how powerful this discourse is. When legitimising their migrations, they refer directly to the term ‘Euro-orphan’, distancing themselves from the publicly constructed moral problem (König et al, 2021). The effects of the public discourse also appear in children’s lives. A study by Seidel (2022) shows that children in Moldova suffer from this breach of normative ideas and engage in stigma management, for example by hiding their mothers’ or parents’ migration from their peers and teachers. The examples mentioned illustrate that the (normative) patterns conveyed in the public discourse on transnational mothers have a strong impact.
Methodology and analytic reflections
The analysis focuses on Polish children’s and YA books written by Polish authors that address the topic of transnational families. The sample was compiled as part of a binational German-Polish project called ‘DoDzi’.6 The research was conducted using various approaches, including interviews with Polish children’s and YA book publishers and participation in book fairs. Three criteria were considered when compiling the sample. First, they should feature a transnational family constellation, whereby transnational families are defined as nuclear families in which fathers and/or mothers migrate and the children stay behind in the home country. Second, transnational families should be a central theme of the book. Third, they should depict parental labour migration, which was included in the selection process due to its association with ‘moral panic’. A total of 15 identified books met at least one of the defined criteria. Of these, seven met all criteria and were therefore selected for analysis (see Appendix for summaries of all seven books).7
The books were analysed using MAX-QDA software, based on grounded theory research methodology (Strauss, 1998). The first open coding revealed a common framework in that the mother figure and the mother-child relationship were at the centre of every story. Either she migrates, as in the case of six books, or she stays at home (alone) with her child, as presented in one book. The mother’s centrality also correlates with the marginalisation of the father figure in the stories (see Appendix).
The emphasis on the mother figure highlights her emotional and normative importance in the books. Further coding rounds revealed that literary representations adhere to the idea of the present mother as the norm. However, how this norm and the deviations from it are presented and accentuated differs in the stories.
Based on the empirical data, three types of mothers were identified: the deviant mother, the incomplete mother and the complete mother. For this article, the three types are presented based on the books that most contrastively and extensively exemplify each type. The deviant mother is depicted in the book Samotni.pl by Barbara Kosmowska (2018), the incomplete mother in Zielone martensy by Joanna Jagiełło (2023), and the complete mother in Dziura w serze by Katarzyna Ryrych (2021). In each book, the mother migrates while the children remain at home with their grandmothers. In the first book, it is the 17-year-old son; in the second, the 12-year-old daughter and 14-year-old son; and in the third, the 12-year-old daughter.
Focusing on one case book for each type of mother allows for an analysis of their representations with a similar degree of contextualisation and reference to the storyline, which is important to the processual nature of the narratives and the nuances of the normative ideas.
Results
The three types of mothers represent the range of portrayals in the books. Their representations vary regarding each mother’s biographical history and her designated role as a ‘good’ mother, the responsibilities linked to her decision to migrate, the organisation of the transnational arrangement, and how her return relates to the notion of ‘good’ motherhood.
The types reflect normative ideas of a ‘good’ mother and their respective distances from the ideal. The deviant mother, as the name implies, represents a mother who deviates most strongly from the norm, while the incomplete mother partially fulfils the ideal. In contrast, the complete mother fulfils the normative ideal entirely. She serves as a reference point for the analysis by illustrating the deficits of the other types and can be seen as a figure that defines the norm. The norm is determined by the extent to which the children in the stories suffer from their mother’s behaviour and whether they question her role as a ‘good’ mother.
In the following section, the three types of mothers are presented in the migration process as outlined in the books: before and during the migration, and in the context of a possible return.
Migrating mothers and the decision to migrate: motherhood before migration
The three stories vary in their portrayal of mothers in terms of their rendering of maternal attitudes and qualities. The respective representations are linked to their decision to migrate and are presented below.
The deviant mother: migration as a search for self-realisation
[She] has the wind in her veins. [...] She cannot stay in one place and time. She rushes on, searches on ... She loses, she believes. She trusts and suffers ... But even when she’s dealing with so many things at once – she still loves you. Every phone call she makes is with good intentions. Not every good intention is fulfilled. (Kosmowska, 2018: 179)
The quote describes an old friend’s memories of the deviant mother (whom he knew as a young woman), which he shares with her son. She is portrayed as unstable and unable to be consistently and reliably present for her child. The deviant mother does not conform to the selfless, domestic mother and complete caregiver. Furthermore, the quote illustrates her inconsistency and perpetual pursuit of elusive self-realisation. She exhibited this behaviour as a young woman and continues it as a mother. Becoming a mother changes neither the rhythm of her life nor her willingness to put her child’s needs before her own (Gajek, 2020). That her values and life priorities have not changed is also evident in her decision to migrate. The depiction of this decision implies that her migration is a unilateral pursuit of personal aspirations, devoid of consideration for alternative paths, seen as the fulfilment of her dreams and an eagerly anticipated opportunity – illustrated by her joyfully showing her son her newly purchased ticket to England.
Consequently, she is assigned sole blame for the separation from her child. Yet, she still loves her son, involving him in her plans and assuring him that he can visit her soon. As confirmation of this promise, she gives him a jumper with the English flag to wear when he visits her in England. However, this can be interpreted as a symbol of her irresponsibility and broken promises, as the story goes on to reveal.
The incomplete mother: migration as a result of false prioritisation
I know it’s horrible to think of my mum as somehow only being there to clean ... But it’s not my fault that she didn’t go anywhere with us, not to the zoo or the cinema, and she always said there was a lot to do at home and she didn’t have time. And she was always telling us off for not getting this or that done. (Jagiełło, 2023: 149)
The domestic organisation of the family’s daily life takes precedence for the mother. As a result, she neglects her children’s emotional needs, and they lack maternal love (Badinter, 1984). She is incomplete in her role as a mother, fulfilling one aspect (maintaining the household) at the expense of the other and setting the wrong priorities in her exercise of motherhood. Clearly, it is difficult for her to strike the right balance between maternal responsibilities. Thus, she is portrayed as misinterpreting her motherhood. A new interpretation of her motherhood is needed, one that embodies an emotional and nurturing mother (Gawlina, 2003) who maintains a loving relationship with her children. Not only the relationship with her children is portrayed as emotionally distant and strained but also that with her husband. The story depicts a father little involved in family life, who, as a truck driver, rarely came home until his visits finally stopped altogether. His leaving the family is a great burden for the mother, not because the husband and father has gone, but because ‘suddenly the money ran out and she had to go to work’ (Jagiełło, 2023: 18). As the job she finds is insufficient to provide financially for the family, the grandmother recommends that she apply for child support – which could have prevented the migration – but she refuses out of implied personal pride. Despite the family’s history, in which the father’s abandonment is described as the initial catalyst for the mother’s migration, she is held partially responsible for the decision to migrate because she does not exhaust all options to prevent the migration – and thus the separation from her children – and even consciously decides against them. This relativises the necessity of her migration and the legitimacy of her decision. Thus, the incomplete mother, too, is portrayed as setting priorities poorly.
The complete mother: migration as an act of strength and responsibility for the family
The portrayal of the complete mother differs from the previous two in that her biographical history is not part of the story. We learn nothing about her process of becoming a mother or of strained relationships, rather, that she grew up in a multigenerational family in which ‘all the women were always brave’ (Ryrych, 2021: 7). Her maternal qualities are never doubted, unlike the deviant and incomplete mothers’. The complete mother is characterised as caring and her relationship with her daughter by tenderness and affection. A picture is painted of a sheltered and well-balanced arrangement in which the child takes centre stage and the relationship between parent and child is harmonious and unstrained. From the daughter, we learn that she grew up in a family where ‘[the word] love was the most common’ (Ryrych, 2021: 74).
Poor mum. Dad would never have allowed it. If he was still alive, of course. One moment of carelessness, one encounter on the road with a drunk driver ... and the whole life of the family changed one hundred and eighty degrees. ‘You can’t give up,’ said the mother once she had cried all her tears and started to take care of herself again [after her grieving period]. [...] ‘As long as you are alive,’ she repeated, ‘you can do anything.’ (Ryrych, 2021: 16)
The mother’s decision to migrate is not so much a choice as a response to circumstances beyond the family’s control, the result of hardship for which she carries no blame. An external factor – a car accident caused by a drunk driver – is the clear disruptor of the family arrangement, both affirming the mother’s (and the family’s) innocence and compelling her to migrate to provide for her family. This mother is depicted as an emotional wife who mourns her husband, and as a mother who, when necessary, draws strength and takes responsibility for her family. Her portrayal includes characteristics of the ‘Mother-Pole’, such as selflessness, complete devotion to her child and family, and acceptance of her own suffering (Budrowska, 2000). The latter is reinforced especially through her husband’s death.
The mother’s decision to migrate is neither about personal gain, as in the case of the deviant mother, nor about misplaced priorities and personal pride, as in the case of the incomplete mother. Rather, the focus is on the precarious circumstances that force the mother to leave her child behind.
Transnational arrangements and maternal duties: the mother during migration
The transnational arrangements in the stories vary in terms of the mother’s ability to adapt to the new situation and fulfil her material and emotional responsibilities during this period. These aspects are discussed in more detail in the following.
The deviant mother: neglect of material and emotional care
All it took was a phone call from some [guy named] John for the clothes to be scattered around the flat, for the perfume bottles from the bathroom and the pins from the hallway to disappear. They were replaced by hasty promises: ‘a better job’, ‘finally my own space’, ‘a few cents for a rainy day.’ (Kosmowska, 2018: 31)
The quote is part of the son’s internal monologue about his mother. The phrase ‘all it took was a phone call from some [guy named] John’ illustrates that the mother finds it increasingly easy to leave her son. Although her endeavours to establish herself abroad prove unsuccessful, she attempts it repeatedly at the child’s expense.
Here, the deviant mother’s transnational arrangement is based on unfulfilled promises to her child and on her distance from him to the point of complete physical and emotional separation. It is clear from the story that the mother’s emotional performance decreases in intensity over time: ‘Sometimes she called’ is followed by ‘It’s clear that she didn’t call’ (Kosmowska, 2018: 17). Her life plan has no space for her son’s needs or feelings. We learn in the story, for instance, that her son once ran away from home to prevent her from migrating: ‘I wanted her to look for me and miss the plane,’ [said the son]. ‘And where did she find you?’ [asked a friend]. ‘She wasn’t looking’ (Kosmowska, 2018: 133). The mother is portrayed here as inconsiderate and indifferent to her child’s needs. Moreover, she neglects her financial and care obligations towards her family. Consequently, the son is forced to earn money illegally to care for his sick grandmother. Despite his mother’s shortcomings, the son hopes she will return and change. He prefers her unfulfilled promises and infrequent visits to the thought that she might have disappeared from his life entirely. He recognises her pursuit of self-realisation and can understand it; he only wishes to be part of it. The son tries to maintain a connection to his mother by incorporating thoughts of her into his daily routine. This can be seen when he listens to the London weather report on the radio or indulges in his hobby of building model aircraft, fantasising that one of them will ‘take him straight to his mother’s English flat’ (Kosmowska, 2018: 18).
The incomplete mother: neglect of emotional care
The incomplete mother’s transnational arrangement is characterised by repeatedly setting false priorities when it comes to emotional closeness to her children. Faced with new responsibilities, she again misinterprets her motherhood: while providing financial security for her children, she neglects their emotional care. Although the mother lacked emotional closeness even before migrating, living together created a certain cohesion. After migration, however, this bond dissolves and a new form of belonging must be established. While the children adapt to the new situation and try to involve their mother in everyday life, the mother prevents their relationship from developing. The children cannot call their mother, for example, ‘because Mum will not be happy about the call, she will probably shout that we have to pay a lot for the bill’ (Jagiełło, 2023: 153). In other words, there are no calls ‘just’ to talk (Jagiełło, 2023: 51).
The growing importance of economic considerations for the mother exacerbates this process and contributes to her increasingly materialistic orientation. As a result of the mother’s behaviour, the children begin to grow away from her. Whereas they initially missed their mother and suffered from her absence, the situation is now reversed: the children suffer more when their mother comes home because she does not appreciate their efforts and interrupts their daily routines. Instead, they discover advantages for themselves when their mother is away. The daughter compares the family’s situation before and during migration: ‘She was constantly reprimanding us for not doing this and that. And now we’ve found out that not everything has to be buttoned up to the last button, and you can live like that too’ (Jagiełło, 2023: 49). The climax of both the emotional estrangement between mother and children and the physical absence of the mother in the children’s lives is reached when the daughter is almost kidnapped and the mother is not even informed: ‘And then, because we were still awake, we realised that we hadn’t even let her know what had happened. That we had forgotten about her existence at all!’ (Jagiełło, 2023: 175).
The complete mother: material and emotional care
Every day – you could tell from the note posted in the kitchen – Mum had different chores to do. Monday – clean the hallway. Tuesday – prepare the laundry for washing and tidy up the washed clothes. Wednesday – clean the stairs [...]. Thursday – wash the cars. [...] Even Sundays [...] were not completely free. (Ryrych, 2021: 16)
‘Learn French [...]. I think you’ll be able to visit me on holiday soon ...’ [said the mother].
‘And what does learning the language have to do with it?’ Marianna [the daughter] asked.
‘You want to be able to communicate somehow. Unfortunately, I’ll have to work during this time,’ her mother explained. (Ryrych, 2021: 6)
Emphasis is placed on the mother’s efforts to prepare her child for the visit and make the stay as pleasant as possible. As the mother cannot spend the entire time with her child during the trip due to her work schedule, she ensures that her daughter can manage on her own. Despite being busy during her daughter’s visit, she organises her work in such a way that she still finds time for chats and activities. Her advanced planning and organisation are crucial here: ‘If we want to go out tonight [...] I have to think about something for dinner now’ (Ryrych, 2021: 59). This careful planning ensures that she can fulfil both her professional and maternal obligations. Her daughter’s wellbeing is at the forefront of all her considerations. It is she – unlike the deviant or incomplete mothers – who also takes responsibility for the transnational arrangement. In contrast to the other transnational arrangements, here the relationship between daughter and mother is shown to strengthen through the challenges arising from their separation.
A possible return and the question of motherhood
The mothers’ migration developments in the books vary when it comes to the question of a possible physical ‘return’. The effect this has on their respective motherhoods is presented next.
The deviant mother: loss of motherhood
In the story, the deviant mother’s migration results in a loss of motherhood. She is no longer present in her son’s daily life, only remembered through his memories and the scent of her perfume: ‘[He] keeps an empty bottle of his mother’s perfume in the cupboard. Sometimes he even sticks his nose into the narrow bottle to smell the increasingly faint scent. As fleeting as time and just as fickle’ (Kosmowska, 2018: 54). The quote emphasises the mother’s long absence and the son’s longing for her. As the perfume slowly fades, so, too, does the mother’s presence. Disqualified as a ‘good’ mother from the start, this representation is further reinforced as the story progresses. Nevertheless, her son remains emotionally attached to her despite her behaviour and cherishes his dream of being in each other’s lives. Only with time does he begin to distance himself emotionally from his mother. His longing to be part of her life remains unfulfilled. He feels increasingly abandoned by his mother and calls her a ‘liar’ and a ‘phantom mother’ (Kosmowska, 2018: 135). The son’s emotional distancing is symbolised in the story by his getting rid of all mementos of his mother’s presence and unfulfilled promises, such as the English jumper he was supposed to wear when visiting his mother abroad, or the model aircraft built in the hope of reuniting with her. He stops waiting for his mother and loses his faith and trust in her motherliness and maternal qualities. He rejects his mother and revokes her motherhood.
The incomplete mother: rediscovering motherhood
When we get up in the morning, Mum makes us breakfast. We eat scrambled eggs and watch the snow fall.
‘I’m glad you’re back,’ [said the daughter].
‘And I’m not planning to go [...],’ [replied the mother].
‘Really?’ I throw myself at her and think I couldn’t have heard anything better. (Jagiełło, 2023: 89)
The quote is from a conversation between mother and daughter after the mother’s return. ‘Return’ refers not only to migration but also to her role as a ‘good’ mother. In the previous portrayals, she was described as an emotionally absent mother with misplaced priorities. Now, we are presented with a caring mother who is involved in the everyday lives of her children. This harmonious image, in which the mother turns towards her children, contrasts with the previous depiction of a ‘cold’ mother who never spends quality time with them. She rediscovers her motherhood through her absence and finally gets her priorities right. An important aspect of her transformation is reflecting on her failures as a mother and on the obligations and priorities she neglected: ‘What would my life be without you? I’m sorry if you had any trouble at school ... And especially about what happened to you, my daughter ... I can’t think about it in peace. And I promise I’ll try to find work here ... Even if I have to clean’ (Jagiełło, 2023: 190). The mother redefines herself through her children and prioritises them by attributing to them all meaning in life. Emphasis is placed especially on her new selflessness and willingness to make sacrifices, as she puts her own needs aside in favour of her children’s wellbeing. By taking responsibility for her children’s situation, she shows an awareness of the effect her (in)actions have on then. Her maternal love is demonstrated by her caring and self-sacrificing devotion, now qualifying her as a ‘good’ and complete mother. This can only be achieved by seizing the opportunity to transform herself, and it must also be accepted by her children.
The complete mother: readjusted motherhood
‘We’re going to spend next summer together,’ she said. [...] ‘I’m just doing a bit of tidying up with the bills. [...] I’ll manage to pay off all my debts by the end of this year. I’ll look for work in Poland. I can see that you don’t like what’s happening here, right?’
‘Yes [...] I ... I can’t imagine you ...’
‘Sometimes you have to do something you don’t really like.’
‘I know, my grandmother calls that “higher goals”.’ (Ryrych, 2021: 90)
The complete mother’s maternal attitude and qualities enable her to continually reflect on and (re)interpret her motherhood in relation to changing circumstances and her responsibility for her child. Migration and the resulting separation of mother and child were once necessary to ensure the latter’s wellbeing, but as soon as the mother achieves her ‘higher goals’, she decides to return. She always considers her daughter’s wellbeing, even sacrificing herself for her child and family: ‘Sometimes you have to do something you don’t really like’ refers to the severity of the paid domestic work she takes on to ensure her child’s wellbeing and to their unavoidable separation. This is a mother who consistently puts her child’s needs and wellbeing before her own (Hryciuk and Korolczuk, 2015).
In contrast to the other two stories, here the mother and daughter’s separation is portrayed from both the child’s and the mother’s perspectives, clearly demonstrating the bond between them. The complete mother’s responsible behaviour, characterised by readjusting her motherhood for the sake of her child, is in the foreground.
Conclusion
The stories analysed depict migrating mothers as practising a deviant form of motherhood, thus emphasising the norm of the physically and emotionally present mother. In this respect, the literary representations mirror the images conveyed in media discourses. Yet, how the migrating mothers are portrayed is more diverse than the oversimplification seen in the media discourse. The stories are not characterised solely by the negatively connoted term ‘Euro-orphan’, which reduces (maternal) migration to the moment of ‘migration’ and overlooks the broader circumstances (Urbańska, 2015; Walczak, 2016). Instead, these migration portrayals in children’s and YA literature offer a wider context, including the family history and reflecting diverse motivations – sometimes selfish, sometimes for the family – where the children are either neglected or the mother works with them. Furthermore, the deviations from the ‘good’ mother are nuanced differently in the stories and are woven into the individual biographies and personalities of the mothers. Depending on how these are constructed in the stories and how they progress during the migrations – based on different turning points and storylines – the outcomes of the stories also vary, as do the outcomes of maternal absence.
The portrayal of the deviant mother centres around the notion that she is a woman unsuited to being a mother. From the outset, she violates the norms of motherhood. Her portrayal resembles the image of the inadequate mother commonly conveyed in media discourses – especially as selfish and abandoning the child. The incomplete mother is characterised by her inability to correctly practise motherhood and set priorities. The complete mother is the normative mother, equipped with adaptive capital (König et al, 2021) and the knowledge of how to react in times of need. She is shown to continually modify her motherhood in the interests of her child, setting the standard for appropriate maternal behaviour. However, she also jeopardises her status as a ‘good’ mother through her absence and must undertake considerable efforts to maintain it. Transnational motherhood, therefore, has clear limitations. While there is some leeway in how transnational family arrangements are structured, only a physically present mother can maintain the status of a ‘good’ mother.
In this sense, the stories provide an interpretative framework for understanding migration as a test that measures a mother’s trustworthiness and character, revealing who is considered a ‘good’ mother and who a ‘bad’ mother. Mothers who return physically and emotionally are the good ones. It is therefore important to note that, except for the deviant mother, the mothers return at the end of all analysed books. Furthermore, their migrations can also be seen as critical episodes for their motherhood and families. In the context of critical episodes, the stories suggest that mothers may fail and lose their status as (‘good’) mothers, while also providing new opportunities for them to rethink their motherhood. Consequently, the deviant mother’s story ends with her loss of motherhood, while the incomplete mother rediscovers it. The complete mother merely readjusts. However, a willingness on the part of the children is required as well – motherhood is negotiable.
The literary representations of migrating mothers and their families reveal the ‘crisis of writing about families’, as Gromadzka (2017: 362) puts it. The analysed stories focus on deviations in transnational motherhood and family life but lack the effort to overcome certain normative ideas or stereotypes. Instead, these stories reinforce normative patterns of ‘good’ motherhood: their centrality in family life is highlighted (Sikorska, 2019), and the mother is reduced to her maternal duties, while the norm of her physical presence with her children is reaffirmed. This norm, and thus the break with it, is further underscored in the presented stories by the differing ways the children in the books suffer from maternal migration. Even the complete mother’s child suffers – not because of the mother herself, but because she knows her mother must perform hard labour abroad. In other words, maternal migration, along with the associated physical absence of the mother, is always problematic, regardless of the mother’s attributed ‘qualities’ or the family arrangement. Importantly, however, the children in the stories are not depicted merely as victims or ‘orphans’, as in the media discourse, but rather as individuals with agency who are capable of taking action when needed, for instance by detaching themselves emotionally from their mothers. This perspective expands the context of loneliness and abandonment discussed by Zając (2023; see also Rembowska-Płuciennik, 2024) and highlights children’s active role in their lives, as well as their part in co-shaping the ‘good’ mother (as in the case of the complete mother’s child).
The analysed literary representations of transnational families – and their explicit reference to the term ‘Euro-orphan’ – show that the topic evokes strong social emotions. This is particularly problematic today, as transnational motherhood is a (necessary) reality for many mothers. Representations like those analysed here can pathologise and stigmatise mothers, their children and their families. These representations and the norms they perpetuate are powerful and influential, just as are portrayals in media discourses. They can permeate personal and collective perceptions and expectations, therefore (re)producing stigmatisation and societal inequality. With few children’s and YA books that address transnational labour migration, there is a high probability that children interested in this topic will turn to the analysed books – especially considering that several have won literary awards. Thus, they have the potential to reach a wide audience and convey normative images of motherhood, childhood and familyhood that should be strongly questioned. In this context, Rembowska-Płuciennik (2024: 283) argues that literature on transnational families ‘missed the opportunity to provide an unbiased explanation of a difficult social issue’ and overlooked the potential to present familial changes as positive opportunities and avenues for adaptation to new situations. This article comes to a comparable conclusion.
Notes
All quotes from the analysed books were translated by the author of this article.
Polish literature played an important role in shaping and disseminating this image of the mother. An example is the famous poem ‘Do matki Polki’ [To the Polish Mother] by Mickiewicz, in which the mother is supposed to prepare her son for battle (Szlachta-Ignatowicz, 2022).
In this context, Gawrońska and Sikorska (2023) even conclude that the figure of the Polish mother is currently reinforced by other social expectations that transform her into the model of a ‘Polish supermother’.
Similarly, Ducu (2013) for Romania, Lutz (2018) for Ukraine, and Seidel (2022) for Moldova.
In this context, parallels can be drawn to other moral discourses and panics such as the ‘latchkey children’ in the US in the 1940s and ‘Schlüsselkinder’ in Germany in the 1950s (see Sommerkorn, 1988; König et al, 2021).
The acronym comes from the Polish title ‘Dorastanie w rodzinach transnarodowych. “Dobre dzieciństwo” z perspektywy dzieci’. The project is led by Alexandra König (on the German side) and by Dorota Michułka (on the Polish side). Project number 465048370. For more information see: www.uni-due.de/biwi/koenig/dodzi.
The sample excluded books featuring parents migrating for research purposes, considered a privileged form of migration, and those that explored transnational families beyond the nuclear structure. Future analyses may incorporate these books to offer additional contextualisation. This would make it possible to evaluate differences (for example, in terms of social status or family arrangement) and possible similarities.
Funding
This work was supported by the German Research Foundation (DFG) and National Science Centre (NCN) (Grant no 465048370).
Acknowledgements
I would like to sincerely thank Maraia Bonsignore for proofreading and providing constructive feedback. Your sharp eye and valuable comments were greatly appreciated.
Conflict of interest
The author declares that there is no conflict of interest.
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Appendix Classification of children’s and young adult books/narrative framework
| Book title, author, publication year | Book category, target age | Narrative framework |
|---|---|---|
| Samotni.pl [Lonely.pl; authors’ translation], Barbara Kosmowska, (2018) |
Young adult literature Target age: +/–16 |
The protagonist (son, 17) lives with his grandmother, while his mother has migrated to England. We learn little about the father, whom the son has never met. As the mother has long since migrated, her son has been raised primarily by his grandmother. Currently, he is responsible for the household and for his ill grandmother. The story tells of the son’s longing for his mother, his everyday life and his difficulties, especially after his grandmother falls ill, as well as of his first love. |
| Ma być czysto [It Has to Be Clean; authors’ translation] Anna Cieplak (2016) |
Young adult literature Target age: +/–16 |
After her mother migrates to Germany, the protagonist (daughter, 15) lives with her mother’s partner and two younger stepsisters. We learn little about the birth father. The protagonist takes on responsibility for her younger stepsisters. The story tells of the daughter’s everyday life and especially of the difficulties of growing up. |
| 16:10 do Bergamo [16:10 to Bergamo; authors’ translation] Piotr Rowicki (2017) |
Children’s/Young adult literature Target age: +/–13 |
The protagonist (daughter, 13) lives with her grandfather after her mother migrates to Italy. We learn that the father and then the grandmother died by suicide, after which the mother remains alone with her daughter and father-in-law. The story tells of the daughter’s everyday life during her mother’s migration, her longing for her mother, and her running away from home after her grandfather is hospitalised and she decides to look for her mother abroad. |
| Tata gotuj kisiel! [Papa Makes Jelly; authors’ translation] Barbara Stenka (2016) |
Children’s literature Target age: 9+ |
After losing her job, the mother searches for new employment in England. The protagonist (daughter, 9) lives with her grandmother after her mother migrates. She does not know her father when the book starts. The story tells of the daughter’s everyday life after her mother migrates, as well as of her encounter with her father, whom she first meets after her grandmother falls ill while the mother is abroad. |
| Zielone martensy [Green Martens; authors’ translation] Joanna Jagiełło (2023) |
Children’s/Young adult literature Target age: 14+ |
The protagonists (son, 14, and daughter, 12) live with their grandmother after their mother migrates to Germany. Of the father, we learn that he left the family and no longer takes (financial) responsibility for them, so that the mother must fully assume this role. After the mother migrates, the son takes over responsibility for the family, his sister and the grandmother, who falls ill during the story. The story tells of the children’s everyday lives after their mother’s migration and of the events that occur when the grandmother falls ill. It also tells of the son’s first love. |
| Kominiarz na święta [A Chimney Sweep for Christmas; authors’ translation] Madlena Szeliga (2018) |
Children’s literature Target age: young children |
The protagonist (son, age unknown) lives with his mother at home, while his father works abroad. We learn little about the father aside from his absence. The story depicts the preparations for Christmas Eve, which are incomplete and gloomy due to the mother’s longing. The mother is unable to take care of preparations properly because of how much she misses her husband. The mother does not migrate in the story, but she too must emotionally return to her son. |
| Dziura w serze [A Hole in the Cheese; authors’ translation] Katarzyna Ryrych (2021) |
Children’s literature Target age: +/–12 |
The protagonist (daughter, 12) lives with her grandmother and great-grandmother after her mother migrates to Belgium. Her father was killed in a car accident, after which the mother must take on sole financial responsibility for the family. The story tells of the daughter’s everyday life and adventures, particularly when she visits her mother’s workplace abroad during school holidays. |
